Just pasted by Chris (PHA|\|TOM) in #tauranga:
[00:03] *** PHA|\|TOM changes the topic to '#tauranga created on Fri Feb 12 19:06:48 1999 | Happy Ten Years of #Tauranga :D'
Jesus yarped!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Monday, January 12, 2009
Manny's 'Big Day Out' in Grafton.
(This tale is not to be confused with 'Fluffy's Big Day Out. That is another story)!
It was such a hot day that Manny decided to take a break from the Office and take a quick jaunt over to Grafton. He made himself at home and jumped up onto the table.
Manny was very quickly joined by company in the form of the neighbours moggy jumping up on the table too. Love at first sight is the first thing that springs to mind!
How wrong we were to think that! The wretched cat was hungry and went straight for Manny's jugular artery!
In an eye blink Manny was incapacitated and lay bleeding terribly - staining the cutting board that so conveniently seems to appear out of nowhere.
R18: The following picture may disturb some viewers so we have rated it 'restricted 18 years or older'! Please use your discretion when viewing!
It was obvious that Manny was up a creek without a paddle!
Luckily for Manny (and CharlieK) some local lads were in the area so we waved them down instead of dialing 111 for the Ambulance Service!
They were quick to set up a triage area and Manny quickly had an IV administered, an EKG set up and a defibrillator ready to shock the bee-jesus out him!
Suddenly Manny went into cardiac arrest and his poor little perspec heart went 'blargh blergh' and he went ka-put! Not even a panadol bought him around.
Quickly one of the lads began CPR and after 5 compressions a puff of plastic dust was seen to blow out of Manny's nostrils! He was alive but not well!
An 'on the spot' triple bypass was undertaken! It was messy! It was Gory! It was disgusting. It was ... bloody! Smells of the Normandy Beach Landing hung in the air. Memories of 'Hamburger Hill', 'Full Metal Jacket' and 'Platoon' came flooding back! Every one cursed Tom Jones' 'Whats New Pussy Cat'!
After 20 minutes of 'triple bypassing' Manny suddenly recovered and stood up. A bandage was quickly applied to his chest to stop the blood from squirting everywhere and it worked!
In fact a halo was seen around the sun and at the same time the strum of heavenly harps were heard strumming from nowhere. An eerie feeling unfolded but Manny was back!
Another 5 minutes later he had recovered fully so the Fire Brigade left and Manny stood large and proud on the table oblivious to the preceding events that had just occurred. In fact, he was a minuscule slightly thirsty! When offered some cold water he refused it!
Instead, he opted for a very quiet one or two with the inhabitants of Grafton and that was the end of his BDO!
By all accounts Manny is still strapping along well but has asked when he will be going to Waiheke Island for a BDO.
That was January 12, 2009!
Acknowledgment to Fire Appliance picture: New Zealand Fire Service
It was such a hot day that Manny decided to take a break from the Office and take a quick jaunt over to Grafton. He made himself at home and jumped up onto the table.
Manny was very quickly joined by company in the form of the neighbours moggy jumping up on the table too. Love at first sight is the first thing that springs to mind!
How wrong we were to think that! The wretched cat was hungry and went straight for Manny's jugular artery!
In an eye blink Manny was incapacitated and lay bleeding terribly - staining the cutting board that so conveniently seems to appear out of nowhere.
R18: The following picture may disturb some viewers so we have rated it 'restricted 18 years or older'! Please use your discretion when viewing!
It was obvious that Manny was up a creek without a paddle!
Luckily for Manny (and CharlieK) some local lads were in the area so we waved them down instead of dialing 111 for the Ambulance Service!
They were quick to set up a triage area and Manny quickly had an IV administered, an EKG set up and a defibrillator ready to shock the bee-jesus out him!
Suddenly Manny went into cardiac arrest and his poor little perspec heart went 'blargh blergh' and he went ka-put! Not even a panadol bought him around.
Quickly one of the lads began CPR and after 5 compressions a puff of plastic dust was seen to blow out of Manny's nostrils! He was alive but not well!
An 'on the spot' triple bypass was undertaken! It was messy! It was Gory! It was disgusting. It was ... bloody! Smells of the Normandy Beach Landing hung in the air. Memories of 'Hamburger Hill', 'Full Metal Jacket' and 'Platoon' came flooding back! Every one cursed Tom Jones' 'Whats New Pussy Cat'!
After 20 minutes of 'triple bypassing' Manny suddenly recovered and stood up. A bandage was quickly applied to his chest to stop the blood from squirting everywhere and it worked!
In fact a halo was seen around the sun and at the same time the strum of heavenly harps were heard strumming from nowhere. An eerie feeling unfolded but Manny was back!
Another 5 minutes later he had recovered fully so the Fire Brigade left and Manny stood large and proud on the table oblivious to the preceding events that had just occurred. In fact, he was a minuscule slightly thirsty! When offered some cold water he refused it!
Instead, he opted for a very quiet one or two with the inhabitants of Grafton and that was the end of his BDO!
By all accounts Manny is still strapping along well but has asked when he will be going to Waiheke Island for a BDO.
That was January 12, 2009!
Acknowledgment to Fire Appliance picture: New Zealand Fire Service
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Saint Patricks Day 2009
Feelers are starting to go out now for all munters that are interested in taking the day off to celebrate this prestigious event here in Auckland. If we get a few together it could be one hell of a day! Very advisable to take the next day off too to recover! Would be good to see any #Tauranga people too :) Expressions of interest can be sent to Saint Paddy the Munted Maori or hit me up on MSN or IRC.
Kind of looking to make up some sort of 'Itinerary' that suits all :) There will be no fees or nothing like that just a 'Buy Your Own' thingy during the festivities. Like last year could be relying on 'Linking It' from Newmarket in to town as a sober and cheap form of transport :)
Friday, January 09, 2009
Introducing - BBQ-GIMP 2009 ©
Grafton Net has, patent pending, introduced the new revolutionary 'BBQ-GIMP 2009'! Transport your Gimp Chair and Food via the BBQ-GIMP 2009 to the BBQ with ease and convenience.
Order now on 0508 BBQ GIMP and be one of the first 1000 to use your Visa, AMEX or MasterCard and receive a pkt of 'Grafton Net BBQ Fire Starters'! These new fire starters slightly resemble a sparkler *cough* and with ease you can ignite your accelerant cubes with 'safety and convenience'. Don't call now as our Call Centre Staff aren't waiting and the 0508 number is just a fallacy :P
Order now on 0508 BBQ GIMP and be one of the first 1000 to use your Visa, AMEX or MasterCard and receive a pkt of 'Grafton Net BBQ Fire Starters'! These new fire starters slightly resemble a sparkler *cough* and with ease you can ignite your accelerant cubes with 'safety and convenience'. Don't call now as our Call Centre Staff aren't waiting and the 0508 number is just a fallacy :P
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Grafton Vege Garden Progressing Well
Although the white bleeding butterflies have had a feast, there will still be a sizable crop to 'harvest' :P
The Green Peppers in the front have actually mutated to something resembling the face of an ugly Klingon! Once grown properly will have to take a pic.
The Green Peppers in the front have actually mutated to something resembling the face of an ugly Klingon! Once grown properly will have to take a pic.
Mt. Eden to North Head
Destination: North Head. Pic below taken from Mount Eden.
Destination achieved. Below is from North Head back to Auckland City.
From North Head facing North. This is the beach where Cactus and Co 'covertly obtained' a bucket full of sand for the table legs on the front porch.
Destination achieved. Below is from North Head back to Auckland City.
From North Head facing North. This is the beach where Cactus and Co 'covertly obtained' a bucket full of sand for the table legs on the front porch.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Know Me - Get PWNed!
Izzy is how I first knew him by name.
Chat but mostly Music, old and new, is his game.
Original creations and adaptations cram my files;
(Lost the god damned cellphone again, so never dials).
Honesty, integrity and mate-ness is his tradition.
We both share the consequences, joys and love of adoption.
Many ales have been consumed and many more will,
(God knows of the places we have been where he is known to spill).
On today, January 7, after quite a few coldies to quell the summer thirst,
I wish my mate James, a Happy Twenty First.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Cactus reaches 100
One Hundred Pints of Guiness has been attained and the name of Cactus will appear on the 'wall of fame' at the QF Tavern sometime soon. Watch here for more!
Pool Tourney - January 4, 2009. Blergh!
Sunday evening saw a quick walk down to Symonds Street to pick up Zafa from work and then it was off to SPUTNIK to play some pool.
Pool commenced where it was an up and down affair.
The beer was good, although some didn't like Tui, but the service was good.
Gregster and Cactus lost the tourney 5 games to Zafa and WoW's 6 so we commandeered the bar!
Then it was down to QF for some Guiness & sp8's whereupon someone went to sleep ...
Pool commenced where it was an up and down affair.
The beer was good, although some didn't like Tui, but the service was good.
Gregster and Cactus lost the tourney 5 games to Zafa and WoW's 6 so we commandeered the bar!
Then it was down to QF for some Guiness & sp8's whereupon someone went to sleep ...
Been and Gone!
Happy New Year 2009 All!
Also the weekend just passed, 3 Jan to 4 Jan 2009, Gregster hit Auckland!
Many ales consumed and an unofficial Pool Tournament against Zafa & WoW.
Also the weekend just passed, 3 Jan to 4 Jan 2009, Gregster hit Auckland!
Many ales consumed and an unofficial Pool Tournament against Zafa & WoW.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)